His Sentence:
The flies were his only friends--little excited beings--who didn't care about the stale food or cool climate of his cell.
From The Broker by John Grisham
The use of an appositive phrase separated by unusual dashes reflect his lonliness in his cell.
My Sentence:
The hunter tracked his prey-he would feast--using only the trail of blood to find the kill.
-- Posted from my iPhone
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
Sentence a Day #9
His Sentence:
At six the following morning, the vice president was driven in his usual armed caravan to the CIA head-quarters at Langley. From The Broker by John Grisham
An appositive phrase at the beginning of the sentence describes the time the president was driven.
My Sentence:
At nine the past morning, the hunter drew down on the beast he had made such a brilliant shot on.
Sentence a Day #8
His Sentence:
What a moment!
From The Broker by John Grisham
The short exclamation is very efficient in showing a character's attitude towards a subject or event.
My sentence:
What a shot!
Sentence a Day #7
His Sentence:
What a mess!
From The Broker by John Grisham
The use of a short exclamation emphasizes shortly and simply a mess.
My Sentence:
It's a kill!
Sentence a Day #6
His Sentence:
The use of an appositive phrase separated with dashes brings out the phrase emphasizing the country inn.
My Sentence:
The deer flinched in pain--the arrow gliding through the lungs and heart--and the hunter relaxed after a great shot.
Sentence a Day #5
His Sentence:
Some documents-doctored but still classified-were smuggled out by a Hubbard mole who was reporting everything to his superiors.
From The Broker by John Grisham.
The use of dashes to bring out the appositive phrase by the unusual syntax.
My Sentence:
The weapon of choice- a compound bow with razor sharp broad heads-was about to reach its full potential.
Sentence a Day #4
His Sentence:
He listened to it from time to time, understood not a single word, and worked hard to convince himself that he could master the language.
From The Broker by John Grisham.
He uses an appositive phrase to emphasize the attitude the character has towards the language he is learning.
My sentence:
The hunter sat still, not moving a single muscle, eager to draw down on the beast that expected nothing.
Sentence a Day #3
His Sentence:
Joel soaked in the quaint little shops--the tabaccheria with racks of newspapers blocking the door, the farmacia with its neon green cross, the butcher with all manner of hams hanging in he window, and of course the tiny sidewalk cafes where all tables were taken with people who appeared content to sit and read and gossip and sip espresso for hours.
From The Broker by John Grisham.
His use of epistrophe in the repetition of the clauses emphasises Joel's frustration of being locked up for 6 years and noting all of the "normal" people living "normal" lives.
My sentence:
The couple would like the appliances, and the furniture, and the telivision, and the oven, and the fridge, and most of all, a low price.
Sentence a Day #2
His Sentence:
He couldn't blame her. It was his fault. Everything.
From The Broker by John Grisham.
The short choppy sentences reflect frustration and even anger in the character's voice.
My Sentence:
The pain was excruciating. Piercing. Far greater than expected.
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